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My Fear of Growing Old as a Gay Man

Picture Credit: Jagveersingh MalkhanSingh Rajoriya‎/ QGraphy

Having seen those gay men who are old, I could only think of two possible options for them – The Masc and the Fem. Going through Instagram and Facebook, I have observed one thing. The Masc guys have higher demand as they age, to a point. While Fems have been subject to a lot of disadvantages through out their lives, it doesn’t get any better as they age. 20 to 30 is the best time that they would have. The ones that I know end up being more and more lonely, with friends that they have, they don’t really get a companion that they spend time with. Their desirability goes down. It’s painful to see them this way.

However the masculine counterparts get to enjoy life till their 40s. I met two guys in their early 40s who get hit on my younger guys even today. In fact, until they mentioned their age, it was hard to know that they are so old!. The Mascs who have a rocking body, with their rugged looks, attract so much attention, when compared to their Queer counterparts.

This makes me wonder how would I grow old? I read an article by a guy in his 50s who mentioned how every guy would reject him and even if they did come, they asked for money to sleep with him. He mentioned that he is feeble looking and the saving grace to the otherwise grim article was that he is waiting for a rugged 40 something to fall in love with.

I then went on thinking if the 40 something chooses a fem guy in 50s when others from 30s and even 20s drool over them? Of course, the ones in their early age would be interested in them for pretentious reasons, and unless they are sensibly looking for something more than just looks, it is hard for the old aged to get someone they desire.

There is another paradox where even the Mascs get a beating. If the Mascs are looking for someone who is more Masc than them to settle down with, may be someone older as well, then again, although they have several young men drooling over them, they wouldn’t still feel settled for the way they are. It seemed all rosy to grow old as a Masc, but then if you are innately looking for a man who is matured and masc, then it’s not something that is easy to find. This I realised when a really handsome guy in his late 20s (not too Masc, nor too Fem) made it clear that he was looking for a “fit older guy”, and he is still single (after a bad breakup from a 4 year relationship). Then I heard about another guy in his early 30s, who fucks around with younger guys, but wants to settle down with older fitter guys.

With every older Masc guy wanting older fitter guys, all that attention from the younger lot goes to the fodder.

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